Blue Eyes, Brown Eyes
by AlisraSkywall
Summary: Post Infinity War. Tony always thought her eyes were beautiful, but he never believed in that as much as he did now. And so he stared, and stared, deep into those blue eyes, because if he didn't he might go insane. Stony, Fem! Steve, a little OOC, Steve x Tony, AU
1. chapter 1

**The aftermath of Infinity War.** **What happens after half the unive** **rse has died. I've read so many amazing post snap stories I felt inspired to write one of my own. And I'm such an avid shipper of Fem! Captain America and Tony Stark that I was like, YAAASSS!!!!**

 **So constructive criticism is well appreciated, but NO STRAIGHT UP MEAN COMMENTS OR I WILL REPORT YOU. NOT JOKING HERE.**

 **See y'all!**

Tony Stark slumped to the ground in defeat. Thanos had won.

 _Thanos had won._

 _Thanos had won._

 ** _Thanos had won._**

He still couldn't really wrap his head around it. Half of the entire _universe_ was dead. No matter how he tried to force the image of Peter's sad smile as he faded away, disappearing into tiny chunks of ash.

The realm seemed to cry out in fear and mourning, as a beautiful sunrise rose over Titan, illuminating he and that Nebula girl in a cloak of red, orange and yellow. He almost chuckled at the thought of what his fellow surviving Avengers would be doing on Earth.

Had Clint survived? Natasha? What about-

Stella.

He leapt to his feet at the thought of the blonde, ponytailed super-soldier. Flecks of green-teal in breathtakingly blue eyes. The gentle curve of pink lips against soft, creamy skin the last time he saw her. Her tight spandex suit, decorated with lines of white, blue and red stretching tight across her-

He coughed, shaking his head free of any impure wonders and fantasies. Although however much he tried he couldn't banish the mental image of Stella panting and breathess beneath him, her spandex suit forgotten on the floor, her ponytail loose with long blonde hair flowing out in waves as he mercilessly pounded into her-

"STARK!"

He jerked from his land of dirty thoughts and spun around to meet the exasperated, if not slightly amused face of Nebula. He flushed, knowing she knew what he'd been thinking of.

"We must go back to Earth. I am guessing you would like to see the blonde human?"

He snorted. "Which one? Stella, (cue annoying blush) Thor, Pepper, god damn this guy but SCOTT?"

Nebula rolled her eyes and gave him a push towards the ship. "Come on. We have to move."

He nodded, wincing at the stab wound in his chest. "I'd like to give Thor a punch in the face so he one day understands the meaning of GO FOR THE FUCKING HEAD."

Nebula shrugged, leading him up the steps of the ship. As he entered the cabin, he noticed the chalky brown ash covering the surface of Titan.

He froze. Nebula frowned, turning to him and asking what was wrong. But all he could see was the situation on Earth, Stella stumbling towards him and throwing herself into his arms, sobbing into his shoulder as he laid her down softly onto the ground, the accepting look in her eyes as she whispered an apology and crumbled into nothing.

Suddenly Peter took her place, stumbling towards him and throwing himself into his arms, sobbing into his shoulder as he laid him down softly onto the ground, the accepting look in his eyes as he whispered an apology.

Then she was back, shuffling towards him. He reeled up, overjoyed, throwing his arms out to meet her when he saw her.

Feet twisted at painful, irregular angles. Ponytail loose, clear blue eyes dull and clouded. Her back swayed as she moved, her chest stuck out irregularily. Her head was cocked to the side, a long black lacy dress covered in mud, blood and grime clinging to her somehow still beautiful figure.

She made her way to his side. Every atom in his body was screaming at him to _run, run, run, move before she-_

Before she does what? Kill him?

Stella wouldn't hurt him.

Right?

Her voice filled his ears, overriding his barely sane brain and sinking into his thoughts.

" _You did this to me, Tony."_

 _"You could've stopped this."_

He was dimly aware of the fact that he was on a ship and Nebula's frantic voice was dulled in the background and that he could see space and Earth jumping at him but he just _couldn't._

 _"Tonyyyyy..."_

 _"Fix meeee..."_

 _"Wouldn't want your precious little Stella to turn on you, huh..."_

 _Her nails pierced his skull. Petrified, he waited for the pain, but none came. Her lips ghosted over his skin, brushing lightly at his nape and trailing lightly down the side of his neck._

 _"Stella!"_

 _Somehow he found his voice. She pressed an elegant finger to his mouth._

 _"Shhhhh..."_

 _"Sleep now, Tony..."_

 _With a smile on his face, he allowed himself to sink into blissful oblivion._

 _Stella won't hurt me._

 **So, what did you think?** **Please review, like, follow!** **Love,** **Lizzy-chan**


	2. An Update On My Life

Hello!

No, unfortunately I haven't died.

I understand I haven't touched any of my stories for a strange amount of time. It's not that I don't have any motivation, it's just that I'll be taking a potentially very long hiatus to write conpletely on Archive of Our Own.

I don't understand why, but I think it's because I find it a lot easier to write on that site. Ideas flow from my mind easier, and to be honest, I've been getting more positive support.

Because I don't choose to talk about my mental health a lot, people often don't know the whole story, and I figured it was about time I told some actual human beings.

I know some people receive help abd support because they pour out their feelings through their work, and while I do love angst, I don't write it full-time.

I prefer to bottle emotions, not let then out.

PMs and DMs are private, but people have said some hurtful things about my work, and I want to remind them that if you don't like it, it's your fault, not mine, and if you hate it so much don't read it!

There is something called Preferred Personal Writing Style, you know. My opinions and how I choose to write shouldn't affect you to the point of calling my work useless trash.

Even if I were as bad at writing as you say, which I could be and maybe I'm just not seeing it, I can still be a great person, even if I'm not the best in the world at writing.

I don't know how you tracked down my Ao3 account, perhaps I told you in a story and forgot, but please don't leave negative comments. It doesn't feel very good.

It feels even worse when you get a bookmark and are excited only to find out the Additional Notes section says ONLY BOOKMARKED BECAUSE I WANTED TO SHOW MY FRIENDS THAT STORIES THIS BAD DO EXIST AFTER ALL.

Things like this are what causes depression.

I have insomnia, and I used to be able to relax because I felt happy that people were giving me such awesome support. Now that's not really happening and even though it's gotten better, lack of sleep is still looming behind me.

And I want to say to user AnonymousForPrivateReasons, what you think about me doesn't matter.

You want me to be more open about my life? Fine. I'll be more open.

I'm a fifteen year old kid with depression, anxiety and PTSD, only recently recovering from insomnia. I live under a constant pressure from so-called "Parents" to be perfect and just stop my mental health problems. I have friends, but I can't trust them with any secrets because oh I so want to, but I don't know whether they'll turn on me and stab me in the back or not.

So, all you internet warriors, don't throw away your shot to actually be a good person. After all, you're just like your comments: young, scrappy abd hungry for drama.

Shoutout to whoever caught the reference.

If you want to check me out, NOT bring me down any further, my Ao3 account name is ninehundredthousandfinalwords and my Wattpad is superchrisevans.

My Instagram is 900000wordslefttosay. NOT ninehundredthousandfinalwords. Someone already took that name.

A pat on the back to anyone who goes through what I'm going through, and to those who hate me for being me, well, if you feel like joining the fight against depression anytime soon, I'm willing to wait for it. *wink*

Bye!

Love,

Lizzy


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